Always There Part 1

Author : Autobot Lancewing

Date sent : January 15, 2012

Rating : G (Everyone)

Category : Other

Description : Jenna finds an abandoned wolf puppy and adopts her. Meanwhile, Aleu returns! Contains Prologue and Chapters 1-6.

Length : Short -

Characters : 3510 visits



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                  G (Everyone)
Always There Part 1
By Autobot Lancewing

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This fanfic was rated G (Everyone).


Comments

3511 visits

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Last comments

February 12, 2012
Usa Male Is not currently on the site
Not bad for a first fanfic--reminds me of my first attempt. A couple things, though:
You seem to be shifting between past and present tense a lot, which makes it confusing and hard to keep track of what's going on. Keep it consistent.
I also suggest you work on characterization and content. The personalities are fine, but the dialogue seems choppy, and it just doesn't feel like the characters. I highly doubt they would make decisions as important as that in a few seconds, so you could easily expand the dialogue sessions.
Otherwise, I like it.




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